Research shows this strategy can boost your relationship satisfaction.
A growing number of people are microdosing drugs like cannabis and LSD to enhance their athletic performance. Now, some are taking the concept of microdosing into their sex lives to up performance in the bedroom.
A new study suggests that one way for couples to jumpstart their desire, whether they’ve been married for years or are just starting to date, is to microdose it. The idea is that a small libido-boosting activity one day can lead to more and better sex the next day.
And it’s not just about more pleasure. “Sexual desire is directly related to satisfaction in relationships,” says the study’s lead author Kristen P. Mark, Ph.D., associate professor in the department of kinesiology and health promotion at the University of Kentucky in Lexington. “By keeping your desire alive, you’ll be keeping your satisfaction alive, too.”
The research
Mark and her team surveyed 87 mixed-sex couples, but “many of the same ideas could apply in same sex relationships, too,” notes Mark. Each pair had been together an average of nine years and the median age was 33. For 30 days, the individuals were asked to report their level of desire and any sexual activity with their partner.
Couples who had sexual desire on one day tended to feel more desire for their partner the next day, whether or not they actually had sex. This was particularly true for men, but women tended to feel more like having sex if their partners reported desire for them on the previous day.
The recommendations
Mark suggests complimenting your partner’s physical appearance or whispering something sexy to them before they walk out the door for work. Sexting also counts, and it’s even been shown to strengthen relationships. Or, do something you two would normally do, like cook dinner together, but remove a few articles of clothing before you get started.
The bottom line
The idea is to put sex front and center, even in small ways. But also: “Don’t be afraid to schedule sex,” says Mark. “It can be the first thing to go when you’re overwhelmed or really busy, yet, connecting with your partner in that way can be helpful for mitigating some of that stress.” But that doesn’t mean sitting down together with calendars. Sending a racy sext with a date and time is a much more sensual way to get your message across and build desire at the same time.
Photo: Serge Guerand / BLAUBLUT-EDITION.COM